This time last year-.

This time last year we were not friends.
This time last year we were not friends, either.
I'm glad that we changed.
I'm glad we are friends now.
Although I'm not sure how we happened.

But we happened.
This time last year-
it's not that I didn't like you;
it's not that you didn't like me,
but I was here,
and you were not.
You were there
and I was not.
Then we happened upon the same place where we laughed, cried, and tried to tell each other a few lies,
but we were quickly undone when our boundaries faltered,
crumbling heavily and loudly onto the ground.
This time last year we wanted protection-
searched everywhere within- why didn't it occur to us to look out?

This time last year we were not friends.
This time last year we did not know we could trust each other so well.
This time last year we were strangers.
This time this year I am glad we can be different together.

my stranger.

i have dreamt of many faces,
but yours isn't among them.
so many strangers.
where are my friends?
i never know what to do with strangers.
they are so distant
but have no problem bumping into me,
accidentally holding my hand
or stepping on my toes,
sincerely apologizing, but quickly forgetting their misdeed,
paying attention to another stranger--
their friend, not me--
i'm no friend of theirs.

i have dreamt of many faces,
but yours isn't among them.
is that my fault?
do i only pretend to know you?
oh, but you're not a stranger!
does that make you my friend?

your acquaintanceship hurts.

i much prefer your strangeness:
to feel free to wonder about your life,
imagine what your struggles might be
never to worry that i might be one of them;
to sincerely apologize for stepping on your toe but quickly to forget my misdeed.

feigning distance hurts much more than actual distance.

i have no reason to reach out to strangers--
i wish i didn't want to reach out to you.

my stranger?
my friend?
acquaintance.

i have dreamt of many faces,
but yours isn't among them.

you must be standing behind me, then,
waiting to surprise me.

i'll practice my 'surprise' reaction for you.